I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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