Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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