Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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