Swine flu. Run for my life!
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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