fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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