Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Someone shit on the floor
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize