You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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