Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I puked a lego.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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