he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
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Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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