I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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