it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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