There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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