grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
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I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
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Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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