Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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