He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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