drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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