I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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