There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
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But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
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I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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