life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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