Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Mom said you looked used
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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