Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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