Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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