...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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