just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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