So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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