oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize