i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize