she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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