This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
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Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
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I will be naked everywhere
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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