spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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