dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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