Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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