I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize