Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Do vagina's smell?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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