??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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