just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Randomize