absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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