Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've created a new STD.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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