so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize