I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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