he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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