you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize