Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Sorry my hands just texted you
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize