Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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