he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
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Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
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I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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