You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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