Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
"it" just moved
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize