I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize