Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
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No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
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Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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