Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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